unfortunate

I just had to stand unreasonably close to some guy on the subway.  Note that I did not say "uncomfortably".  That would imply that the train was just really crowded, and there was no choice but to stand in positions that created physical discomfort.  No.  This man was simply standing unreasonably close.  It wasn't rush hour, and we weren't at a particularly popular station.  Maybe there was some really fat dude behind him pressing him into me, but this was very unsettling.  His briefcase (along with his hairy arm) was closer to me than my own bag was.  Unreasonable and unjustified.

At least he smelled really, really good.

Speaking of unfortunate, I just encountered two girls who used to go to international school here and now go to Exeter.  After reprimanding them (as is customary) for their sadistic way of teaching math, we started talking about...more interesting things.  Well actually, the topic of conversation wasn't really that interesting, but I was just half intrigued, half totally disgusted by their ridiculous way of talking.  Actually, more than half totally disgusted.  Try about 97% completely humiliated on their behalf.  They mixed English and Japanese shamelessly.  And it wasn't even normal Jenglish.  It was appalling and utterly unforgivable Jenglish.  Like every two words, they'd throw in some Japanese phrase, making their speech incomprehensible.  Try figuring this out:

"OMG, I did majide badly on that test!  Tashikani, it was like chottodake hard, but I'm like sukoshizutsu getting atama hennninatteru.  Like, seriously, I was dying and tochuude mou I was like, "Fuck this" and I just suteta."

..............WHAT.  I was literally so close to slapping their little heads and screaming at them.  I mean really.  Japanese-speaking people can't understand them, and English-speaking people can't understand them.  Only extremely specialized, fluent Jenglish speakers can somehow, miraculously, figure out what they're saying.  It's like some weird ultra-exclusive jargon.  But worse, because it's not put to good use.  At all.

Also they were uber abusing the phrase majide.  Which basically means "seriously".  Seriously.  Okay I do it too, but the word "seriously" just sounds so much prettier than "majide".  Right?  Yeah I'm totally right...haha I'm just biased.  But whatever.